"What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be."
scrolled across this quote on pinterest and it couldn't be more applicable to what i'm going through right now. i've always had an image of how my life was supposed to be. in my last relationship, i could have sworn up and down i was going to marry my boyfriend, and if you know me you know there's no way on God's earth that will ever happen. i was going to go to school in virginia (which did happen) but i was never going to come back to de. i was going to stay there forever, but now i'm applying to jobs in delaware and looking for apartments. i wasn't supposed to get into OT and i was supposed to keep cheerleading. i wasn't supposed to love my college friends the way i do but they've become more of my family than the people i share blood with. i was supposed to go straight from undergrad to grad school and then get a job just the way everyone does, right? wrong. i was supposed to care about what my family thinks about me not following the "path destined for me" (whatever the hell that is) and becoming much more average than what is expected of me. but i'm like, i have so many plans for what i want to do and lives i want to affect that i'm way more awesome than the frustrated lives you're living. my relationship with God is growing closer through personal experience than the forced religious life you're trying to shove down my throat. and i'm in love with an amazing guy that helps build me up whenever you all beat me the hell down with your expectations and your visions for my happiness. funny how it's supposed to be mine and it's somehow yours right? haha. i don't even want you all to spoil the energy for life i've found through him. point is, my life is my life. and i'm sooo happy with it. i feel free. i'm smiling and dancing and singing with a new joy in my heart that you will never take away. took me 21 years to find it and i won't let it go. the name of the game: I WIN!
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Thursday, January 10, 2013
dear jmu
dear jmu,
from the moment i set foot on this campus i knew you were for me. there is such a spirit and way about this campus that welcomes anyone, welcomed me, and immediately gels you into what is know as the jmu family. this campus: your hills (which i've hated some days), your beauty, your food, your people, your decorations, and your atmosphere is nothing short of amazing. you somehow attract people with some of the biggest hearts on the face of this planet. if i didn't have that mindset when i came here, i definitely do now, and i have you to thank for that. even your parties, known for their free beer and nights full of overly friendly people making friends for the night on the drunk bus have a different aura about them than do those at other schools. jmu, you have taught me things about myself i would have never known. you opened my eyes to my real interests. you opened your wide array of resources to me. you gave me the best friends i'm convinced i will ever know, friends that have stepped in and been my family when my own family just wasn't there the way i would have liked them to be. i don't blame them, but i thank you, because it if wasn't for you, i would have been alone during some of the hardest and most difficult times of my life. you blessed me with the unmatched feeling of a jmu game day. spending every home game at the 50 yard line, losing my voice along the sides of my best friends who share the same love for sports that i do, singing the fight song (which is awkwardly one of my favorite songs ever), throwing those purple and gold streamers after every touchdown and field goal, and cheering on more of my good friends down their on Zane Showker Field. that spirit, that love, that ritual became a part of me, and i cannot wait to return as an alumni and do the same.
now don't get me wrong, jmu, there were times when i hated you like an evil ex-boyfriend. the parking and class registration struggles never seemed to end. and later in my jmu career, my schedule outside of class got busier, and my attitude about some things became a little more negative. but no matter what, any time someone reminded me "oh you're graduating next year", i became overwhelmed with sadness. you have been so good to me, and although a drastic change must come along with the may 4th commencement ceremony, i will forever be indebted to you. all of the friends, sorors, professors, faculty, and administration here collectively have helped mold me into the young woman here today. i just hope that i make you proud when i'm miles away from the little town of harrisonburg, virginia.
thanks again jmu. with all my love,
Sydney c/o 2013
Alumni from day one.
p.s. I don't care what you say, my school is better than yours. GO DUKES!
from the moment i set foot on this campus i knew you were for me. there is such a spirit and way about this campus that welcomes anyone, welcomed me, and immediately gels you into what is know as the jmu family. this campus: your hills (which i've hated some days), your beauty, your food, your people, your decorations, and your atmosphere is nothing short of amazing. you somehow attract people with some of the biggest hearts on the face of this planet. if i didn't have that mindset when i came here, i definitely do now, and i have you to thank for that. even your parties, known for their free beer and nights full of overly friendly people making friends for the night on the drunk bus have a different aura about them than do those at other schools. jmu, you have taught me things about myself i would have never known. you opened my eyes to my real interests. you opened your wide array of resources to me. you gave me the best friends i'm convinced i will ever know, friends that have stepped in and been my family when my own family just wasn't there the way i would have liked them to be. i don't blame them, but i thank you, because it if wasn't for you, i would have been alone during some of the hardest and most difficult times of my life. you blessed me with the unmatched feeling of a jmu game day. spending every home game at the 50 yard line, losing my voice along the sides of my best friends who share the same love for sports that i do, singing the fight song (which is awkwardly one of my favorite songs ever), throwing those purple and gold streamers after every touchdown and field goal, and cheering on more of my good friends down their on Zane Showker Field. that spirit, that love, that ritual became a part of me, and i cannot wait to return as an alumni and do the same.
now don't get me wrong, jmu, there were times when i hated you like an evil ex-boyfriend. the parking and class registration struggles never seemed to end. and later in my jmu career, my schedule outside of class got busier, and my attitude about some things became a little more negative. but no matter what, any time someone reminded me "oh you're graduating next year", i became overwhelmed with sadness. you have been so good to me, and although a drastic change must come along with the may 4th commencement ceremony, i will forever be indebted to you. all of the friends, sorors, professors, faculty, and administration here collectively have helped mold me into the young woman here today. i just hope that i make you proud when i'm miles away from the little town of harrisonburg, virginia.
thanks again jmu. with all my love,
Sydney c/o 2013
Alumni from day one.
p.s. I don't care what you say, my school is better than yours. GO DUKES!
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